tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18365524484317978912024-03-14T00:19:28.025-07:00Dalyn WoodsFalling in Love with
Everyday Heroes
Dalyn Woodshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16903354078978879958noreply@blogger.comBlogger17125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1836552448431797891.post-37691076097160485142019-12-19T05:00:00.000-08:002019-12-23T11:50:51.487-08:00The Builder<div class="MsoNormal">
Are you drawn to Steady Freddie? A modest, reliable family man?
The guy who quietly repairs the widow’s porch, volunteers at the food bank and
serves as a deacon in your church?</div>
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If so, chances are you never back-talked your teachers or
took sick leave unless you were at death’s door. You’ve probably already created
an Excel spreadsheet for the party you’re having next month.</div>
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You and Freddie are Builders, and you’ll make a great team. He’s
probably an administrator in the military or possibly an accountant. You’re on
the board of several charities, always looking for ways to give back to the
community. Your children will be well-mannered; your home a safe haven of efficiency.
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What could possibly go wrong? </div>
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According to Helen Fisher’s book <u>Why Him? Why Her? </u>the
test group contained 28.6 percent Builders, however, there were fewer Builder
men than Builder women, so competition for Freddie will be fierce. </div>
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Builders find routines comforting and these repetitive
actions increase serotonin levels. Your even keel is the product of serotonin,
however, an imbalance can lead to obsessive compulsive disorders including
hoarding.</div>
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Every coin has two sides so look long and hard at your
potential hero. Beware of morality that borders on legalism. Don’t let loyalty
to his mother trump his responsibility to you. </div>
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In order to be his heroine, guard against becoming hypercritical--let
him fold the towels the “wrong” way. Don’t hold his faults up as worse than
your own and keep your eyes on the future. Wallowing in past regrets or
pessimistic thoughts is a romance-killer. </div>
Dalyn Woodshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16903354078978879958noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1836552448431797891.post-13781293557358920702019-11-14T05:00:00.000-08:002019-11-20T19:52:35.753-08:00The Explorer<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWt1R5OGuC5q8tAoU8QIq1JKqRPgbFJflkP6attduD9ddHw-1qv8utHcYBzdKLJRcQl-yWbvNtrgYeQzxCHiYaBqMlpiRjlhfA4mA1nujTT-Y-yypjrQeKI06yuze7yvUGHKHmWl3nhWoh/s1600/The+Explorer.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="133" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWt1R5OGuC5q8tAoU8QIq1JKqRPgbFJflkP6attduD9ddHw-1qv8utHcYBzdKLJRcQl-yWbvNtrgYeQzxCHiYaBqMlpiRjlhfA4mA1nujTT-Y-yypjrQeKI06yuze7yvUGHKHmWl3nhWoh/s200/The+Explorer.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
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You’ve met that guy – the daredevil who loves skydiving,
whitewater rafting and talks of climbing Mt. Everest. </div>
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Maybe you’re a bundle of energy, always trying new things –
from exotic foods to worldwide travels. Or perhaps you only dream of those things
– circumstances forcing you to seek your adventure through voracious reading
and trips to museums. </div>
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According to Helen Fisher in her book <u>Why Him? Why Her? </u>The
Explorer personality made up 26 percent of her test group with a slightly
higher number of males. </div>
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Driven by dopamine, a brain chemical that controls reward,
pleasure, movement and emotions, Explorers are novelty seekers and risk takers.
They are energetic, creative, generous, optimistic, autonomous, liberal, daring
and curious with a wide variety of interests. </div>
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Depending on your personality type, that may sound
exhilarating or terrifying. </div>
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If this describes the hero of your dreams, pause a moment to
consider the downside. This is the man most likely to become bored and restless
in a marriage. His impulsiveness may lead him to blowing the rent money on a
get-rich-quick scheme. </div>
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We are fearfully and wonderfully made, a complex mixture of neurotransmitters,
electrolytes and hormones, to name a few. Just as an imbalance in insulin can
cause a diabetic coma, an imbalance of dopamine can cause several problems
including, Parkinson’s disease, bipolar, schizophrenia, addiction and attention
deficit hyperactivity disorder. <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEdanGqkfVdHQJEQKHKRJOMBEbXftmTkvc1h5MObode4zd9lclbXWjH_1PzHXSpqkCXCfDK0a-dfdCgUQpO-pVqdqDscXtofi8VJJim7GyiSs0cNsi8wFcIG4fZ8GRLil2kbHoCCYZB3x1/s1600/hot+air+balloon.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEdanGqkfVdHQJEQKHKRJOMBEbXftmTkvc1h5MObode4zd9lclbXWjH_1PzHXSpqkCXCfDK0a-dfdCgUQpO-pVqdqDscXtofi8VJJim7GyiSs0cNsi8wFcIG4fZ8GRLil2kbHoCCYZB3x1/s200/hot+air+balloon.jpg" width="176" /></a></div>
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Warnings aside, is he a match? </div>
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If he’s a pure Explorer – this is a case where opposites DON’T
attract. A quiet homebody would bore him to death. On the other hand, if you’re
an Explorer yourself, seeing every challenge in life as an adventure, this may
be the perfect match for you. An important consideration would be the secondary
personalities of you both.Dalyn Woodshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16903354078978879958noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1836552448431797891.post-37691649502195988232019-10-17T05:00:00.000-07:002019-10-19T07:23:31.904-07:00It’s Not All About Gender – Book Review<div class="MsoNormal">
So as I’ve been studying relationships, learning about food
groups and planets, I sometimes find myself in the wrong food group or planet.
I’ll think, that describes my husband, not me. We’re still opposite/complements
just not in all the stereotypical ways. </div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiMLFbn4DRd39KLNBRSNvhrx55l5x3gPuuwFjMJtwAE7mm9FtnI328IDdK5iP7Ymg911U_7s4mZqKaLQhWP8FfSIJ8NMNnbOsx71Lek8DERY8IZcJjZazhoTBmeOwwYM_iQ71ig1Aui4Uz/s1600/artisan-759765__180.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="162" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiMLFbn4DRd39KLNBRSNvhrx55l5x3gPuuwFjMJtwAE7mm9FtnI328IDdK5iP7Ymg911U_7s4mZqKaLQhWP8FfSIJ8NMNnbOsx71Lek8DERY8IZcJjZazhoTBmeOwwYM_iQ71ig1Aui4Uz/s200/artisan-759765__180.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Check out this hunky florist</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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To say that men are not artistic or do not express emotion denies the beautiful music, art and poetry created by males. And they weren’t all gay. To imply that these men are effeminate is ridiculous. I kept thinking to myself, it has to be more than gender
differences, some of this boils down to personality.<br />
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Helen Fisher agrees with me. In her book <u>Why Him? Why
Her?</u> she expounds on her personality theory. She believes personality
doesn’t spring from the date of our birth or nine points in a circle, but
rather from the chemical balance in our brains. This makes sense to me. We
certainly know how hormones can affect us, turning sweet, gentle souls into
raving maniacs for brief periods of time. It also explains why we may have
dominant traits, but we can see traits from other personality types surface
from time to time. Because we all have the four chemicals Fisher believes
determine personality in varying levels. </div>
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Dopamine, serotonin, testosterone and estrogen. Just reading
those four words, I could visualize the list of personality traits for each. </div>
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This is not a plug for transgender lifestyles. <a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="_GoBack"></a>Because when I took her personality trait test I scored
highest in the two generally associated with men, but let me assure you I have
no desire to cross over. I like my heroes big, strong and MALE! And that
doesn’t mean a man who scores highest in one or two of the personality types
generally associated with women can’t be your dream hero – you’ve just lucked
up, because rather than drag you by the hair to his cave, he will probably
romance you all the days of your life. </div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWd_FeAKp3UOyqFuG3FxgJISP729Q6nnWAivI3w4cg_wKTPbxhyhaUjUrtURwmriaYTZYgQFzkzx1L1AdtOeh7VBPJDhCd72BWMJNV4ljVVWegz_sybIOIxOiiKuNgWBo5TzNfB1_0AARb/s1600/Clark+Kent+-+Superman.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWd_FeAKp3UOyqFuG3FxgJISP729Q6nnWAivI3w4cg_wKTPbxhyhaUjUrtURwmriaYTZYgQFzkzx1L1AdtOeh7VBPJDhCd72BWMJNV4ljVVWegz_sybIOIxOiiKuNgWBo5TzNfB1_0AARb/s200/Clark+Kent+-+Superman.jpg" width="133" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Don't miss Clark waiting for <br />
Superman</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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Since this book resonated so strongly with me, I’ve chosen
to use it as the basis to discuss four personality types and their best
matches. Keep in mind that personality is just one component of what makes you
tick. Others would include gender, birth order and life experiences. All of
these unite to make you a unique individual specifically designed for your
special hero. </div>
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The one caveat I would offer regarding this book is her
strong affinity for evolution and survival of the fittest. I simply substituted
those assertions with our loving Creator God. </div>
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Dalyn Woodshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16903354078978879958noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1836552448431797891.post-70947797225556255072019-09-19T05:00:00.000-07:002019-09-19T20:11:21.866-07:00Analyze Yourself! A book review <div class="MsoNormal">
It’s hard to be something for someone else if we don’t even
know who we are. So let’s start there. </div>
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Who are you? </div>
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If you’ve never taken a personality test, there are plenty available
online. But are they accurate or just some crazy mumbo-jumbo? As I’ve said
before there are several different types and I recently came across a book that
explains many of them. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirNRwlX_BngIPYfR4Wx7TjFiVaqXlbOwU9Ey-j0G1RrieTr8PrfR1zlElUS44KzcauxnN0xt1CF4AOa8JXoDwR9pmgC0GDK2w0vAFBg40isI4r8_4OKSvs4RVFs1RJuosryIN_3OEL9mrL/s1600/Preferred+Enneagram.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="174" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirNRwlX_BngIPYfR4Wx7TjFiVaqXlbOwU9Ey-j0G1RrieTr8PrfR1zlElUS44KzcauxnN0xt1CF4AOa8JXoDwR9pmgC0GDK2w0vAFBg40isI4r8_4OKSvs4RVFs1RJuosryIN_3OEL9mrL/s200/Preferred+Enneagram.png" width="200" /></a></div>
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<u>Analyze Yourself! The Ultimate Personality Guide</u> by
Jennifer Freed and Debra Birnbaum was very enlightening. For instance, I had
never even heard of Ayurveda or enneagram, which made me a little nervous, but
I found the concepts of both interesting without wandering too far down the
mystical path. </div>
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It covers Western astrology – what’s your sign? As well as Chinese
astrology which is only based on your birth year. As a warning, you may not
want to investigate this system if you’re likely to be offended at learning you
are a rat, snake, dog or dragon. In some of these systems I could readily
recognize myself while others were totally off. </div>
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Overall, I found this book useful. Not only does it list the
strengths and weaknesses, but it also explains how the characteristics of each
personality will play out in romance, friendships, career, finances, fitness
and personal style. I find this especially helpful when deciding on hobbies and
careers for my characters. And it may help you the same way. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgE8nWRTATpFCx7UI8jlZtQQ7Yikn71oJZmFFmKKOfXPOekmsB5SrH2YAEBwIPpozkF8zbQDNjt5Njf1PByOywXgX8QMYCRz4ZOcgNuB6srf_gKSouKFIUl-ywmdDF_Kl84K3GUkagAEXM5/s1600/Chinese+Zodiac.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgE8nWRTATpFCx7UI8jlZtQQ7Yikn71oJZmFFmKKOfXPOekmsB5SrH2YAEBwIPpozkF8zbQDNjt5Njf1PByOywXgX8QMYCRz4ZOcgNuB6srf_gKSouKFIUl-ywmdDF_Kl84K3GUkagAEXM5/s200/Chinese+Zodiac.png" width="200" /></a></div>
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Even if everything
doesn’t fit you might find revealing tidbits, like I did in this paragraph:
“Rabbits work best alone and for themselves…You will thrive in a position that
offers a lot of privacy to do your work.” Hmm, think that describes a writer? </div>
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So take this information with a grain of salt. Have fun
trying to figure out the personalities of random people you meet. But mostly use
it to recognize traits within yourself, strengths and weaknesses, to either
build on or be aware of as you search for the perfect hero to complement you. </div>
Dalyn Woodshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16903354078978879958noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1836552448431797891.post-8462855684544495962019-08-15T05:00:00.000-07:002019-09-14T14:39:09.730-07:00Women Are Like Spaghetti<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpKHFl78dYYPkEbEzi5QLkgl-dbtsp83WL38FNQyaheRf-3Dy9X1LsrZi2CDsoZg4gQfL7kdNto9RlKChUAxMPB3AwUZq0VR4HIKonJ5q3XowxiEorrbXep9epI-7mgHNvqN1PETAxdcCS/s1600/street+grid+pattern.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpKHFl78dYYPkEbEzi5QLkgl-dbtsp83WL38FNQyaheRf-3Dy9X1LsrZi2CDsoZg4gQfL7kdNto9RlKChUAxMPB3AwUZq0VR4HIKonJ5q3XowxiEorrbXep9epI-7mgHNvqN1PETAxdcCS/s1600/street+grid+pattern.jpg" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Think of the grid street design of a small town. The north-
south streets run parallel and are numbered. The east- west avenues run
perpendicular to the streets and are lettered. It kind of looks like a waffle,
making it very easy to navigate. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Now picture the crisscross interstate exchange in a major
city. Flyovers stacked on top of one another, sometimes three and four high. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri";">You trust the signs even though it’s counter-intuitive. The
exit seems to be taking you in the wrong direction as it loops down and in
between the other roads making its final destination impossible to determine. These
are often referred to as a ‘spaghetti junction’. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Where would you rather drive? In whichever pattern is
familiar to you. This could be why there is so much miscommunication between
couples. We’re driving in different systems. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri";">As women we juggle a lot of responsibilities: jobs, family,
church, social engagements, and the list goes on. We walk through a store and
remember that last week, Sophie, whose birthday is in six months, mentioned how
she just ADORES owls, so we pick up that owl-shaped frame, because it will
perfectly fit that picture with her BFF that’s stuck on the mirror. And
speaking of owls, Hayden wants to go hunting with his dad this fall, but you’re
worried that he might get shot and be terrified of guns for the rest of his
life. Then he’ll never join the Marines and his grandfather will be so
disappointed. Yep, need to get an orange vest. Every person, place, thing,
event – past, present or future – lands in the ginormous pile of spaghetti that
is our brain. And that works for us! Thank God He created us with an
all-encompassing, every-box-open-at-the-same-time mentality. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri";">But imagine your waffle-designed hero trying to follow your
spaghetti junction conversation. If you navigate freeway systems on a daily
basis, it makes perfect sense to you, but think back to when you first arrived
in the big city or, as in my case, your hometown morphed into a teeming
metropolis. It was a little confusing, right? Okay, it was downright
terrifying!</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "calibri";"></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "calibri";"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEivLTdj6kCgKpiLZR307aTHEpMLDeQaoVLg4ZFsGdWmk5cn64DzqSmNvtgPx5Pb4KBk8xIpp0wCRpfFGtMeFD0ZwUqzHgIz98MhYbX3g8ROJhTQgBhnYfXJURhQ1nzx_0FvBZb8X2g9kmIp/s1600/spaghetti+junction.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEivLTdj6kCgKpiLZR307aTHEpMLDeQaoVLg4ZFsGdWmk5cn64DzqSmNvtgPx5Pb4KBk8xIpp0wCRpfFGtMeFD0ZwUqzHgIz98MhYbX3g8ROJhTQgBhnYfXJURhQ1nzx_0FvBZb8X2g9kmIp/s1600/spaghetti+junction.jpg" width="200" /></a></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">
</span>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Spaghetti junctions are created for a reason – they’re an
effective way to move massive amounts of traffic efficiently. But remember God also
designed the street-grid mind of our hero. There is no better or worse – He created
the differences and He doesn’t make mistakes. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";"><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Men-Like-Waffles-Women-Spaghetti-Understanding/dp/0736919619" target="_blank">Read more</a> in Bill and Pam Farrel’s book Men Are Like Waffles
Women Are Like Spaghetti </span></div>
Dalyn Woodshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16903354078978879958noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1836552448431797891.post-49334389767154776762019-07-18T05:00:00.000-07:002019-09-14T14:38:30.361-07:00Men Are Like Waffles<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Try writing as a man sometime, figuring out what goes on in
those handsome heads. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">In Love Inspired Suspense books, half the story is seen from
the hero’s point of view. I love reading these stories, because I, like every
other woman on earth, want to know what our men are thinking. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Here’s the problem, most romance authors are women. So how
do we get into our hero’s head? I’m fortunate to have some men, very good
sports, who will bluntly tell me – a man wouldn’t care about this detail. A man
would never say that line. </span></div>
<span style="font-family: "calibri";"></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Beyond torturing friends, I’ve also done a lot of reading. According
to Bill Farrel, behind that gorgeous smile is a waffle. That explains a lot! </span></div>
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br />
</span></span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxu8w2xJO-hxpKgqgLL1ePQx2mNviQHQIIukboLseElUffW2-q3EC7In3myOOWLeh82CE_OwOna7Ayh3vD8lV1y8lZRSjMjC25t1jBSo7ZhyphenhyphenTfjxfdeIlJP271EcvVZzlt-3X9sHCW-r9f/s1600/Waffles+and+Spaghetti+Book+Cover.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxu8w2xJO-hxpKgqgLL1ePQx2mNviQHQIIukboLseElUffW2-q3EC7In3myOOWLeh82CE_OwOna7Ayh3vD8lV1y8lZRSjMjC25t1jBSo7ZhyphenhyphenTfjxfdeIlJP271EcvVZzlt-3X9sHCW-r9f/s1600/Waffles+and+Spaghetti+Book+Cover.jpg" width="147" /></a></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "calibri";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></span>
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Basically his theory says that a man’s mind is divided up
into compartments, like the squares on a waffle. And, here’s the really hard
part to comprehend – men can only be in one, maybe two boxes at a time. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">One of the things I found interesting from this book is how
men de-stress. They actually have squares in their waffle set aside for that.
We think they’re avoiding or ignoring us when they play golf or watch football,
when in reality they’re in their decompression chamber recuperating from the
day. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Women, on the other hand, like to talk things out. I’m not
sure about you, but this need is so strong for me that if there’s no one to
talk to, I’ll talk to myself. Or at least journal my thoughts until I have all
my problems laid out and thoroughly discussed. Then, finally, I can relax. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">We accuse our men of not wanting to talk about anything, ever.
However, I have it on good authority that this isn’t true. Rather, they like to
mull over their problem first, cleaning up the thorny underbrush until they
have a clear understanding of the situation. Then they will seek wise counsel.
We can be that trusted resource if we converse in an orderly manner. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">So when we’re talking to our hero we need to identity the
square we wish to visit and stay there until we’re ready to move on, carefully
closing that box before announcing the new location. That means discussing our
toddler’s playground clash without obsessing about the certainty of a criminal
career. Apparently our tendency to link current events to future outcomes jumps
about fifteen boxes in a man’s mind. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUh19tETYUEGsGpfYoyTqs2fbvoOvMKtX555B2WsN1N9U95L8U9E852-AW3dYVe3D1y00oVwIKb7kH-d66YdjrDrqJhCei7Bm948_2nbCSM4xLmAUVNYNgh1BG0l2XHpq6TYr_QHQSn1k1/s1600/Jerry+Maguire.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="161" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUh19tETYUEGsGpfYoyTqs2fbvoOvMKtX555B2WsN1N9U95L8U9E852-AW3dYVe3D1y00oVwIKb7kH-d66YdjrDrqJhCei7Bm948_2nbCSM4xLmAUVNYNgh1BG0l2XHpq6TYr_QHQSn1k1/s1600/Jerry+Maguire.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">I know. I see the linear connection of point A to point B.
I’m just saying, when his eyes glaze over, pull back and evaluate how to match
the conversation to his boxes. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "calibri";">If we want him to be our hero, we need to be his. That means
recognizing and respecting his perspective. Once we’re anchored in the same box
we can benefit from his complementary mindset. </span><span style="font-family: "calibri";">As Jerry Maguire said,
“Help me help you.” </span></div>
<span style="font-family: "calibri";"></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";"><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Men-Like-Waffles-Women-Spaghetti-Understanding/dp/0736919619" target="_blank">Read more</a> in Bill and Pam Farrel’s book Men Are Like Waffles
Women Are Like Spaghetti </span></div>
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">
</span>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "calibri";"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">
</span>
Dalyn Woodshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16903354078978879958noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1836552448431797891.post-29923349396975514312019-06-13T05:00:00.000-07:002019-09-14T14:37:52.440-07:00Building Suspense: The Ying and the Yang<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Ah, the beautiful mystery of love. The qualities that first
attract us are the very ones that later drive us crazy. Why doesn’t he listen?
Why does she talk so much? </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Because we are different – as varied as breakfast and
dinner, separate planets. And aren’t those differences delicious? Think of your
favorite romance – his muscle-bound arms sweep up her delicate frame and our
hearts go pitter-patter as we swoon. </span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiB7HPBMOPIW4lvpFs-MF2szyRgC-Ql0XFdxAdaepPoIbjYbH2fu5gyusmTD3tXXwhLRV1W5Xd93H2Nh7vMTH-0uqntm6-TY0zjFMS7IT6F9vMuAl1eAwy-TKs1-_hJOZrSeWo3BynRRkUx/s1600/Swoon.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiB7HPBMOPIW4lvpFs-MF2szyRgC-Ql0XFdxAdaepPoIbjYbH2fu5gyusmTD3tXXwhLRV1W5Xd93H2Nh7vMTH-0uqntm6-TY0zjFMS7IT6F9vMuAl1eAwy-TKs1-_hJOZrSeWo3BynRRkUx/s1600/Swoon.jpg" /></a></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "calibri";"> <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">If you like a little suspense with your romance, picture a
young couple racing through the jungle with a maniacal killer on their trail.
Faking an injury, she stumbles and falls, luring the villain in with her
weakness while the hero disables him with superior strength. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "calibri";"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Even a strong, law-enforcement type heroine needs the balance -- the difference -- that a hero brings to the plot. For example, in the ABC dramedy Castle, Rick, the male lead, is hardly your typical hero, but his vivid imagination provides the perfect foil to Kate Beckett's no nonsense logic. She keeps them safe and together they solve crimes. </span><br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpB2MrAGpk17Edoz_x732K5vzzNrnZhoKdgMPWtDK4tV8be7CAlVY2qN5scHSz0CEh1JVyAx-PTukkUFQUu73xFYlIPEXv8Xz6ecljGvthI69pg9kQZA6D_gUpNryC06pB9imCZcQx2oVi/s1600/Castle.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpB2MrAGpk17Edoz_x732K5vzzNrnZhoKdgMPWtDK4tV8be7CAlVY2qN5scHSz0CEh1JVyAx-PTukkUFQUu73xFYlIPEXv8Xz6ecljGvthI69pg9kQZA6D_gUpNryC06pB9imCZcQx2oVi/s1600/Castle.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">
</span><span style="font-family: "calibri";">You may think your life is mundane, but it’s actually full
of suspense. Decisions are made on a daily basis and almost none of them are
easy. It certainly helps to have someone to share the responsibility and
consequences. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Lunch with the girls is fine, but for the unknown future,
the ups, downs, twists and turns of life, we want, no we need, the ying to our
yang – our opposite, our complement, our everyday hero. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
Dalyn Woodshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16903354078978879958noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1836552448431797891.post-89053467936013913672019-05-16T05:00:00.000-07:002019-09-14T14:37:16.756-07:00Opposites Attract; Complements Enhance<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">So after you take that personality test, you might want to
take a long hard look at the personality traits you don’t possess – the type
that is so not you – your polar opposite. Chances are that’s the personality of
your hero because as we all know opposites attract. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">You may think, ‘that’s crazy!’ No, that’s God’s plan – it’s
not so much that opposites attract as that they complement one another. Isn’t
that what we want in a hero -- someone who completes us? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">As I’m developing a romance couple, I look at personality
charts and endow them with characteristics guaranteed to create fireworks. For
instance, a warm, carefree social worker would utterly frustrate a hard-nosed,
regimented businessman. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">But once they resolve their difference, they can actually
complement one another. His practicality can relieve her fears and insecurities
freeing her to pursue her interests while her compassion can temper his
insensitivity allowing him to be a better leader. </span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipL1oERlaOvTHxvFpx5iGNktTMWU3n0rfz0LaVUnI7aTFgVmUD_cEMPWIHoZw80ewid94CSN09wX1lZNn3ahg0QS9fF_o-biqXJWSCtB2JQzRt9-IY4MZy9SZiLMS90xOaNwgBEmugDaJz/s1600/color+wheel.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipL1oERlaOvTHxvFpx5iGNktTMWU3n0rfz0LaVUnI7aTFgVmUD_cEMPWIHoZw80ewid94CSN09wX1lZNn3ahg0QS9fF_o-biqXJWSCtB2JQzRt9-IY4MZy9SZiLMS90xOaNwgBEmugDaJz/s1600/color+wheel.jpg" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Another example is the color wheel. Hues located on opposite
sides of the wheel complement one another which is why we like orange and blue,
well, if you’re a Florida Gator fan. The contrast makes each color appear
brighter together than alone. When decorating a room we use a complementary
color for accents that create energy and vibrancy. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Now we can use analogous colors, those that are next to one
another on the color wheel, for a more calm and relaxing atmosphere. Cool
shades of blue and green may be fine for a guest room, lulling visitors to
sleep.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">There’s something to be said for comfort and familiarity in
a relationship. And that comes, even with opposites – a balance develops, a
routine where we fill in the gaps in each other’s lives. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Do the differences in your relationship bring harmony or
ignite fireworks? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
Dalyn Woodshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16903354078978879958noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1836552448431797891.post-11994441867644089502019-04-15T05:00:00.000-07:002019-09-14T14:36:36.782-07:00To Thine Own Self Be True<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">So from the last blog you might have thought I was
suggesting that you change for your man. No. I’m suggesting that you change for
yourself. To become a better person – the person you were designed to be. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">We are fearfully and wonderfully made – complex creatures
with a unique mix of character traits. But like a photograph each trait has a
negative. Tenacity can become bull-headed stubbornness. Self-confidence can
become pride. Compassion can become enabling.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">You’ve probably taken a personality test and found that
you’re an animal, color or letter. But you’re seldom all owl or all green. Most
people are a mix of at least two personality types. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">I find these tests difficult because I’m thinking, well, in
my personal life I’m this, but in my professional life I’m that… but still with
every test I come out with a similar version of the same personality. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">So according to Tim LaHaye I’m a ChlorPhleg, or using the
DISC method I’m an SC. I’ve never taken the Myers-Briggs Animal Personality
test, and I’m not sure I want to take a chance on being a Hippo or a Gorilla. </span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibLMeoxF19kXwO0l6UUFDHUtu6aaHmUiH2fsQ0qQkfgt4-PAxwWKMuyHO01SgfX8hY25UMpqMthG42kkotNr0LzvOPJ7DzNlieBsSCOq7aHV_RiFDQ0d3rO0fJgxqn7lfZbOkPeVcB-2AJ/s1600/P9030472.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibLMeoxF19kXwO0l6UUFDHUtu6aaHmUiH2fsQ0qQkfgt4-PAxwWKMuyHO01SgfX8hY25UMpqMthG42kkotNr0LzvOPJ7DzNlieBsSCOq7aHV_RiFDQ0d3rO0fJgxqn7lfZbOkPeVcB-2AJ/s1600/P9030472.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
</div>
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">The point is, our personalities don’t change. And guess
what? We won’t be able to change the personality of our hero – so we’d better
know what it is and if we can live with it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">But with knowledge we have the power to guard against
negative traits while enhancing positive ones. The goal of change is to be true
to our best self. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">I love feedback – have you taken a personality test and do
you think it was accurate? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
Dalyn Woodshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16903354078978879958noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1836552448431797891.post-47403559005771560562019-03-15T05:00:00.000-07:002019-09-14T14:35:52.569-07:00Being His Heroine<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">If we want to find our hero in life we need to start
practicing how to be the heroine of his.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">When I’m developing characters in a novel the heroine almost
always carries some part of me or perhaps a truer statement is the me I want to
be. The great thing about writing is I can make her do and say things I’m not
bold or courageous enough to. The bad thing about writing is I have to find her
flaws and create for her a journey of change. Sometimes those flaws hit a
little close to home. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Although it may be painful, take some time to reflect on
criticism you’ve received in the past. Discount the contradictory, cruel
statements that come from only one person (and by the way, if you’re getting
contradictory, cruel statements from a potential hero, here’s a clue—he’s not.)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">In other words, if you often get comments like: that’s a
good idea. You’re a problem solver. I never would have thought to do it that
way. Then one person says: you’re stupid, that’ll never work, where do you get
these dumb ideas – that’s a contradictory cruel statement. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">But what are similar comments that you have heard time and
time again? They may be hurtful. You may become defensive and declare them
untrue, but as you take them as a whole, are you sensing a theme? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">I’ll tell you mine:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">“Hard hearted Hannah.” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">“That’s a little harsh.” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">“Ouch, you don’t pull punches.” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">I see myself as plainspoken, but others see the truth.
Obviously, I need to work on my compassion quotient.</span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiME0yigxCE1AhYrY9ExmWihO1AIOHza5POaXqIXXF8KpLraoiPJs37wFw5bYOebUkiiB1JrHZTCWns2_XP0o2q-JgsGXhFwP4G03tNI841C3Scgj58gpKeb6JKx0pmOGQt8UmiBl8AtaLs/s1600/supermom.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiME0yigxCE1AhYrY9ExmWihO1AIOHza5POaXqIXXF8KpLraoiPJs37wFw5bYOebUkiiB1JrHZTCWns2_XP0o2q-JgsGXhFwP4G03tNI841C3Scgj58gpKeb6JKx0pmOGQt8UmiBl8AtaLs/s1600/supermom.jpg" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Change begins within. If we want to change those around us,
we generally need to start with ourselves. It’s certainly easy to spot the
faults in others, but introspection is a little more difficult. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">But it’s worth the effort. After all, once we find our hero,
doesn’t he deserve one in return? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
Dalyn Woodshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16903354078978879958noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1836552448431797891.post-291109882963998812019-02-15T05:00:00.000-08:002019-09-14T14:35:18.079-07:00I'm No Expert<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">I’m no expert. I’m not a psychologist, counselor or
therapist. But I do have common sense, life experience and friends. And, well,
you know, women love to talk. We especially like to talk about men. What’s
wrong with them, what we’d change, and what we wish we had known before we made
a lifetime commitment. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Then we read a romance novel. The hero is gorgeous, exciting
and oh, so perfect! He never leaves a pile of dirty clothes on the floor and
his whispered endearments are music to our ears. And if we’re reading romantic
suspense, the macho factor goes through the roof. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Here’s the thing: Romance novels are written by women. So of
course, we make the heroes conform to ideals. Fortunately, we live in the real
world. I say fortunately, because face it, the heroines in romances are pretty
perfect, too.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Quite frankly, I can’t
live up to that pressure on a daily basis. </span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjAAlG5dqZ_fcjZS6IhSrL0CUI_pZmo65ygLdylis8Ry909Mj5VuuhiClV6nySUh2AlOD8J8kOzhQGPB3vw288iIazDDFO_ZpFyCUWVTP8E4wR2aeS44BSj78rgsgUDVNk4yGbV1zS61sT4/s1600/Happy-Worker.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjAAlG5dqZ_fcjZS6IhSrL0CUI_pZmo65ygLdylis8Ry909Mj5VuuhiClV6nySUh2AlOD8J8kOzhQGPB3vw288iIazDDFO_ZpFyCUWVTP8E4wR2aeS44BSj78rgsgUDVNk4yGbV1zS61sT4/s1600/Happy-Worker.jpg" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">In the real world our heroes are accountants, mechanics and
utility workers. And if they’re faithful providers, engaged fathers and
spiritual leaders shouldn’t that be enough? Does it really matter that they
don’t fold the towels the same way we do? Isn’t it enough that they fold them? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">So on this blog I’m going to share some of my thoughts about
finding our hero, whether we’re looking across the kitchen table, searching for
some heroic quality in our partner of twenty years or still waiting for him to
arrive on the scene. I’d love your feedback, so what makes your hero appealing?
<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Dalyn Woodshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16903354078978879958noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1836552448431797891.post-7437222755466660852018-02-14T04:00:00.000-08:002019-09-14T14:45:04.527-07:00Praying for Second Place<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Handsome,
dependable, provider, protector, humorous, fun-loving, romantic, spontaneous…<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><br /></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
These are characteristics on most of our “hero search
criteria” lists. Some of us may add ‘attends church’ or ‘spiritual’ as an
afterthought. Okay, maybe you’re a good Christian girl and you listed it first.
But did you add, ‘puts me second’? Yeah, me neither. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1DyYVeF7Hz3zfk3o4ayWXKcBRmguUXyqwb8FaCWKKBe6p8ODhMrcOjXyE5Brhaf4jelwNzTo76Yiz5n-K0IjfRj3xegyBCeB8FfZ8BEN9Xg0zwLXzzWEavWNfapInFRRl1yu0OjfOBHky/s1600/Praying+for+Second+Place.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="225" data-original-width="225" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1DyYVeF7Hz3zfk3o4ayWXKcBRmguUXyqwb8FaCWKKBe6p8ODhMrcOjXyE5Brhaf4jelwNzTo76Yiz5n-K0IjfRj3xegyBCeB8FfZ8BEN9Xg0zwLXzzWEavWNfapInFRRl1yu0OjfOBHky/s1600/Praying+for+Second+Place.jpg" /></a></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I found this meme on A Modern Day Ruth and it made me stop
and think. Am I willing to be in second place? Could I actually pray for that
position? </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
In many Christian romances I’ve read the heroine is the
strong spiritual lead and the hero, big, strong strapping man that he is, may
only be a nominal Christian or not one at all. I’ve always been uncomfortable
with that premise. I mean, there’s a reason God tells us not to be unequally
yoked. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Of course, in these Christian romances the guy always comes
around—he may not have an obvious encounter with God, but he at least attends
church with the heroine making everything hunky dory for that HEA. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I think this is a dangerous example for readers, especially
young women starting out in life, but even seasoned women of a certain age can
be deceived when our heart is racing and our toes are tingling. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Hey, he’s got hormones, too—lit for the chase. And with that
razor focus on his goal he’ll make grand romantic gestures, like hiring a limo
to whisk you away to the opera, followed by dinner at Ruth Chris. There will be
bouquets of roses, hearts filled with chocolates, and, if it seems important to
you, dates at church. Will any of these acts continue after the wedding?
Certainly not every Friday night.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6FBaKrXO-RLCOmisogIq7syI6jSgc3BxS1q_rGrXlXYFki2jcZwg8XNuWJklvikU7ThzRUrkEuNPauqGxchmxQqmzD8vqE2OYtbheOk8EMWvxZcNOANh25fGz5pBOR69QLQUsnirr0kLp/s1600/Red+Roses+Bouquet.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="122" data-original-width="144" height="271" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6FBaKrXO-RLCOmisogIq7syI6jSgc3BxS1q_rGrXlXYFki2jcZwg8XNuWJklvikU7ThzRUrkEuNPauqGxchmxQqmzD8vqE2OYtbheOk8EMWvxZcNOANh25fGz5pBOR69QLQUsnirr0kLp/s320/Red+Roses+Bouquet.jpg" style="cursor: move;" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And that’s okay—grand romantic gestures are for special
occasions.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
But, our faith is for everyday. It’s the foundation of our
life, our world view, the filter through which we sift decisions. Yet to him,
church attendance was an opportunity to spend time with you, woo you. It’s no
big deal. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So, when he wants to take spontaneous trips every weekend
and you’re committed to teach a Sunday School class, you have a hard choice.
Husband? God?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
In <i>My Sister’s Keeper</i>,
Nate, the control freak, resists submitting his emotions to God. Landon, in <i>Exposed</i>, struggles with PTSD and his
ego, but ultimately, both these men seek God’s guidance in their everyday
battles and in winning the heart of the heroine.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
These are the type of heroes we want—strong men of faith who
submit their lives to God so that we can confidently follow their leadership. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So mark spontaneity off the list. Whoa, not so fast—before
that godly husband of yours makes the hotel reservations, he’ll arrange for
your friend to cover your class.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Now that’s romance! </div>
Dalyn Woodshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16903354078978879958noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1836552448431797891.post-44238371281844657232017-01-08T13:20:00.000-08:002017-01-08T13:20:15.685-08:00Missing the Ocean for the Signs<div class="MsoNormal">
Mama was a little agitated the other day so we went for a
drive. She doesn’t get out much these days, choosing to stay in bed most of the
time, so while her energy was up, I thought a trip to the beach would be nice. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Even though it was cloudy with spots of rain, the weather
was warm enough to crack the windows and enjoy the breeze. It was a little
crowded with families still on Christmas break, but I finally found a parking place
with a view of the waves rolling onto shore. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxdYbdEj8dywrgR2gyOU0hfKbfwsVrx6Tk_57uUGWvNAG9gXVDjxQHy9nHxZwyoH4_vB57p81XS9gMBCcE8ekR9kMSTv6gT7pAst20AB0KDxM4Y0XAY9QoOqDF-4Pta8kNiuqzAfirTHwH/s1600/Beach+sign.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxdYbdEj8dywrgR2gyOU0hfKbfwsVrx6Tk_57uUGWvNAG9gXVDjxQHy9nHxZwyoH4_vB57p81XS9gMBCcE8ekR9kMSTv6gT7pAst20AB0KDxM4Y0XAY9QoOqDF-4Pta8kNiuqzAfirTHwH/s1600/Beach+sign.jpg" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Mama, look at the colors of the water. There’s gray and
then the sun’s shining through the clouds right there where it’s green. Then it’s
gray again.” This should have interested my mother, the artist.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Only four-wheel drive vehicles beyond this point.” She
proudly read off the sign beside us. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“We’re not going any farther. Look, there’s the ocean. See
the waves?” </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
She continued reading the signs, like this one: </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSN-agD5b9byMc-Nnd5p3eZr1IWIxU4w1Dt-QncXDMoIVOFnXHjOh6GmX4UwRBPL_9gM9fcfxG1w9SrbI1v7suNVr8K6jqOduXKW0FywIhF2_I_llyVi3Yey2nTq6LM7q5rz579oprNaxt/s1600/Rip+Currents+Sign.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSN-agD5b9byMc-Nnd5p3eZr1IWIxU4w1Dt-QncXDMoIVOFnXHjOh6GmX4UwRBPL_9gM9fcfxG1w9SrbI1v7suNVr8K6jqOduXKW0FywIhF2_I_llyVi3Yey2nTq6LM7q5rz579oprNaxt/s1600/Rip+Currents+Sign.jpg" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Do we do this? God reveals to us the beauty He’s created and
we turn away to read man-made signs. Don’t get me wrong—signs are good. They
warn us of danger and show us the way to our destination, but if signs are all
we seek, then we’ve missed the point. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Mama persisted in reading to me and I really don’t think she
even realized where we were. Eventually it started raining and we moseyed on
home. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
We don’t have her excuse, we can refocus our lives and our
attention. Let’s not get so caught up in the signs that we miss the ocean. </div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
Dalyn Woodshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16903354078978879958noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1836552448431797891.post-37090483785176553702016-11-28T09:45:00.000-08:002016-11-28T09:45:56.074-08:00Ten Miles From Home <div class="MsoNormal">
A local woman died on Black Friday. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
She was young, only 36. I didn’t know her personally, but I
had seen her at church. She sang in the choir, did solos sometimes. She had a
beautiful voice and joyful countenance. She seemed kind and friendly—facts reiterated
in numerous Facebook posts and news websites. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And I thought…I thought what we all think when tragedy
strikes. That could have been me, my husband, or my niece who is that age. The
circumstances of her death were so commonplace—we’ve all been stuck in a back
up on the expressway. The ones that make you nervous—being that last car in the
blind spot after an overpass—you know the feeling. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I don’t travel it often, but I know the section of highway
where she died. It’s on the edge of town—that place where you breathe a sigh of
relief because you’ve crossed the final out-of-town overpass. You’re back in
the familiar; the long trip is nearly finished—ten miles from home. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Think about it. </div>
Dalyn Woodshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16903354078978879958noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1836552448431797891.post-47446613232726305562016-10-08T21:33:00.000-07:002016-10-08T21:33:34.597-07:00Gaining Control, Losing Connection<div class="MsoNormal">
So we survived #hurricanematthew. As a native Floridian, I
wasn’t particularly scared by the dire predictions of The Weather Channel,
after all Jim Cantore never showed up on my doorstep. We live in a rural
neighborhood far away from the ocean and a safe distance from any rivers or
tributaries. Our three acres are heavily treed, but we took care to plant all
the trees a safe distance from the house for storms like this. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh53_frm4pFNyZWifW1QIfimViKDAdb5D_zVDjD2jshMNH24FD-PRu4l9D_t2Go-9ustfZYj5LiBIHb7V8vHw0k-TbjqZtecB0KamFbBEn00TsH4NAInTBDtFUqhxbKww0vho34GCuh7sON/s1600/Before+Matthew.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh53_frm4pFNyZWifW1QIfimViKDAdb5D_zVDjD2jshMNH24FD-PRu4l9D_t2Go-9ustfZYj5LiBIHb7V8vHw0k-TbjqZtecB0KamFbBEn00TsH4NAInTBDtFUqhxbKww0vho34GCuh7sON/s320/Before+Matthew.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My well-balanced philodendron before Matthew</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
When I was nine months old, Hurricane Dora, a category 1,
hit St. Augustine—the one and only direct hit in our area. Our last major
tropical event wasn’t a named storm, it’s known as the ’04-05 season—Bonnie,
Charley, Frances, Ivan, Jeanne--those are just the ones that hit Florida. There were so many storms that year they ran out of
names and started calling them by letters of the alphabet.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
If you look on a map, Jacksonville is tucked away in a
little curve of the coastline. Hurricanes typically sail past us at a safe
distance on their way to wreck major havoc in places like North and South
Carolina. So Matthew didn’t scare me. It concerned me—this was definitely
coming closer than anything else. There would be wind, possibly stronger than
the tropical force winds of 2004, and rain, and, the biggest fear of all—an
absolute given with that much wind—power loss. When would the power go out? How
long would it be out? </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My husband, the Dale in Dalyn, worked for our local electric
utility for 32 years. So I know those guys work hard for long hours with very
few breaks, but still, it can take days at the very least and historically has
taken weeks in some areas to get power fully restored. Downed trees have to be
removed, flood waters have to receded (in case you didn’t know, water and
electricity DON’T mix). Sometimes the problem isn’t as simple as re-hanging the
downed wire. But I digress…</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The point is I KNEW we’d be without power. So I scrambled to
find flashlights, lanterns, and batteries. Since we’re on a well and septic
system, our water source relies on power. We already had plenty of bottled
water and we filled a garbage can in the garage with gray water to flush
toilets (helpful hint: water leaks out of tubs). We had a generator and gas for
long-term use after the storm. The generator wouldn’t run everything, but at
least we wouldn’t lose the food in our freezer and we could switch it around to
different appliances as needed. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And I was prepared to be in constant communication with my
friends and family. I kept my cell phone plugged in so it would be fully
charged whenever the power went out. My laptop battery would last for a few
hours and then I could switch to my tablet with 4G. I could open the garage
door and recharge my cell phone in the car. The TV was on the local news
station to monitor for tornadoes and damage in various neighborhoods. We were
PREPARED! </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Except, we didn’t lose power. The wind blew so hard, I expected the power line outside the window to snap at any moment. The rain fell in sheets, blowing sideways at times. My poor philodendron is permanently lopsided. The whoosh of air down the chimney caused the walls to vibrate and the house creaked and groaned in the strongest gusts. The lights flicked and the power actually went out a few times, you know that off/on, off/on, where you hold your breath wondering if this is it. But it wasn’t. It came back on and held.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="text-align: center;"><br /></span></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5rk9K5aRisTVuk0sfEnc4N4EWWkWb0Jy7Hcdk_OkIHX4ehX3IQG0pJx7m8EFfVX7w0yh4c3Z4Z_LALl-gl6Fw-ufZChCyfbPgOq5oG0gyITrXDGPo5WaIgdfuiRsOsv_EQ5If5drnQ_kf/s1600/After+Matthew.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5rk9K5aRisTVuk0sfEnc4N4EWWkWb0Jy7Hcdk_OkIHX4ehX3IQG0pJx7m8EFfVX7w0yh4c3Z4Z_LALl-gl6Fw-ufZChCyfbPgOq5oG0gyITrXDGPo5WaIgdfuiRsOsv_EQ5If5drnQ_kf/s320/After+Matthew.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Broken and mangled by Matthew</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="text-align: center;">What we lost was communication – no cable, no internet, no
4G. Completely cut off from the news, friends and family. I couldn’t post to
Facebook or send a text and I was getting nothing in return. I was fine, but
what if a family member was trying to reach me? What if my friend had a
problem? I wouldn’t know and they would think I was ignoring them, or worse, worry that I was in trouble. That’s when
I realized COMMUNICATION was what I was afraid of losing, not power. I had a
plan for how I would continue to power my devices so I could stay in touch,
know what others were going through. So what I suffered through the last hours
of the storm was a lack of connection.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I had plenty of books to read. I had a lantern that was as
good as electric to read them by, if I needed it. But I kept picking up my
phone and wondering—is everyone else alright? Was someone trying to reach me? </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
All of this, of course, made me think of relationships. When
we’re fighting for control, maybe it’s not to retain power, but to gain
connection. The funny thing is, in the power struggle we can lose the very
connection we seek. </div>
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Dalyn Woodshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16903354078978879958noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1836552448431797891.post-60370187973850136522016-03-15T05:00:00.000-07:002019-09-14T14:25:03.715-07:00Sebastian the Patient <br />
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Ahhh…Sebastian, the prince of the Woods’ household. This
huge, fluffy socialite first arrived at my sister’s house. He hung around for a
few days—even though she didn’t feed him and, since she’s allergic to cats, she
called me. Of course, being the sucker I am for furry felines, I brought him
home. But I wasn’t going to have cat hair all over my house and clothes, so he would
NOT be allowed inside. </div>
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And then we went to Germany for two weeks to see my niece.
Hunky husband was tasked with taking care of our new family member—and he did
feed him, but royalty demands attention, pomp, circumstance, or at least a little scratch under the chin.
Sebastian is very social. Like, unheard of in cats, social. So he went to see
my nutty neighbor…and stayed. In spite of the fact that she heaped indignities
on him, for instance, she called him Snowball. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Ugh.<o:p></o:p></div>
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First of all, we’re in Florida—we don’t even know what a
snowball looks like. Second of all, how common! This cat clearly deserves a far
more regal name. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Okay, I resigned myself to having lost this cat to the
neighbor.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I still saw him occasionally,
but he obviously preferred their yard. I nursed my broken heart and vowed to
move on. Then I get the call. “Your cat has been in a fight. His leg
is all messed up and you need to take him to the vet.”</div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
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Wait a minute. MY cat? The one you alienated from me with
your superior yard and catnip? <o:p></o:p></div>
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So I take Sebastian to the vet and bring him in the house
temporarily to heal. And then it began. Here’s a couple of pictures of this
wonderful cat submitting to Mama’s petting and swaddling. This cat truly
exhibits the Fruits of the Spirit. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi71vuw2EDZwFTLE4Lf2ejvgA38WfpI5_OHQ5yj-u5rSJjtqVrO46VlVpFUJSMv2NxsQDtYGqLvcmqJ7icfJaixqBNlI1tMk7vNA5zujFgzar1eZxySLBwE9ueyuR7l_NqrEyQPhcMyDS_k/s1600/Mama+with+Sebastian+2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="288" data-original-width="512" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi71vuw2EDZwFTLE4Lf2ejvgA38WfpI5_OHQ5yj-u5rSJjtqVrO46VlVpFUJSMv2NxsQDtYGqLvcmqJ7icfJaixqBNlI1tMk7vNA5zujFgzar1eZxySLBwE9ueyuR7l_NqrEyQPhcMyDS_k/s320/Mama+with+Sebastian+2.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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His leg healed, he could go outside safely again, but…did
you see those pictures? Alas, his socialness was his downfall. In the middle of the
night he jumped up on Mama’s bed.</div>
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She screamed. He scratched. I scrambled. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
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And thus ended a beautiful friendship. He now roams freely
between our yard and the neighbors’ until he requires another vet visit. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br />Dalyn Woodshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16903354078978879958noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1836552448431797891.post-82978305948227928232016-02-15T04:00:00.000-08:002019-09-14T14:27:59.738-07:00Christian Mingle - Movie Review<br />
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<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Maybe you’ve seen that commercial and thought “Aww,
Christians falling in love.” Being a natural cynic and suspense writer, I
automatically go to “Great way to meet an axe murderer.” I mean, these guys
know you’re a Christian and if they have any religious background they can probably
fake the churchy talk pretty good – at least long enough to suck you in. When
the façade starts to slip, it’s too late – you’re in love. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Dead, but in love. That’s how I
would have written the movie. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Corbin Bernsen, writer, director
and producer of the film, also saw the potential for deceit. Apparently not as
suspicious as me, he imagined the comedic possibilities of that deception. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri";">According to his interview with
Beliefnet, “<span lang="EN" style="color: black; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I was
wanting to explore the notion of how we each have our own path to God and to
Christ.” (<a href="http://www.beliefnet.com/columnists/faithmediaandculture/2015/02/writer-director-corbin-bernsen-finds-a-well-matched-creative-partner-in-christian-mingle.html#ixzz3Rke1eVnL"><span style="color: #0563c1;">Read
more:</span></a>) </span>Don’t freak out, from the content of the movie it’s clear he
means the way God uses people and circumstances to draw us to Himself. </span> </div>
<span style="font-family: "calibri";"></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "calibri";"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigNLbrGquWXwVA_JwXP4cT3_r-ODV5g6Yuy9nxUL0pdeZxATeQOxOi-HLcaGRtdFa0IaA2hxhDC_FjRokepM9OYjT9f-NZJiTiOCXkww6Y3Yy-zONlN2-Otn_mXMrPW6T4jUJ5C2f63XQe/s1600/lacey-chabert.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigNLbrGquWXwVA_JwXP4cT3_r-ODV5g6Yuy9nxUL0pdeZxATeQOxOi-HLcaGRtdFa0IaA2hxhDC_FjRokepM9OYjT9f-NZJiTiOCXkww6Y3Yy-zONlN2-Otn_mXMrPW6T4jUJ5C2f63XQe/s1600/lacey-chabert.jpg" width="133" /></a></span><span style="font-family: "calibri";">Lacey Chabert does a wonderful job as Gwyneth (not Gwennie) Hayden, the faux Christian who thinks reading "Christianity for Dummies" (yes, that's a real book) will help her play the part long enough to land Mr. Right.
She also memorizes a list of famous verses – perhaps hiding God’s word in her
heart or at least her head, better than most of us. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri";">There are many different types of Christians represented, from the sappy sweet to the judgmental and perhaps the most common, the stealth Christian. Despite this, Gwyneth delves into Scripture, finds a church that meets her style and eventually realizes that she has to make a heart commitment, not just a head decision. </span> </div>
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">All in all, this rom-com was good, clean fun. Look for the
movie on UP TV February 22 at 5:00 p.m. ET or purchase the DVD through </span><a href="http://hometheaterfilms.com/shop/"><span style="color: #0563c1; font-family: "calibri";">Home Theater Films</span></a><span style="font-family: "calibri";"> <o:p></o:p></span>Dalyn Woodshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16903354078978879958noreply@blogger.com0